It’s easy for intended parents and surrogates to get bogged down by all the appointments, legalities, and planning involved in the process. But taking time to pause and celebrate your surrogacy journey is important.
Realize that surrogacy is not just about the final destination of building a family – though of course that is one of the most jubilant moments. Along the way, you can also honor the relationships you form, the courage you demonstrate, and the love that helps push you through each step of the journey.
Why Celebrating Your Surrogacy Journey Matters
Surrogacy is emotionally taxing. Most intended parents turn to surrogacy after years of struggling with infertility, pregnancy loss, or medical circumstances that prevent even trying for a natural pregnancy.
Likewise, gestational surrogates might experience many emotions as they dedicate their bodies to helping someone else grow their family.
That’s why it’s important for both parties to shift their mindsets from stress and uncertainty to gratitude and connection. You can do this in everyday experiences, such as reminding one another why you chose to journey on this path.
Milestones Worth Celebrating During Surrogacy
When you’re in the surrogacy process, it can be challenging to see the everyday wins and triumphs that bring you to that monumental final stage of celebrating the life you have welcomed.
To help you pause and be grateful, here’s a look at the many surrogacy milestones worth celebrating.
1. The Match Process
One of the first milestones in surrogacy is the matching process. This is the stage when intended parents are paired with their gestational carrier based on shared values, expectations, goals, and personalities.
Matching is deeply personal. For intended parents, they’ll be meeting the person who will carry their child. And surrogates will be meeting the couple with whom they will closely collaborate with over the next several months.
For this phase of surrogacy, you can make the celebration as simple or elaborate as you choose. Some ideas for ways to celebrate include:
- Exchange thoughtful gifts or handwritten letters
- Have a virtual or in-person dinner together
- Create a shared photo album or memory book
- Begin a group chat to document milestones together
- Schedule a small “match day” celebration
2. Embryo Transfer Day
Many intended parents view embryo transfer day as the official beginning of their surrogacy process. You’ve put the legal paperwork and clinical fertility talk behind you to finally take a meaningful step toward growing your baby.
A good way to commemorate the day is with flowers, care packages, matching bracelets or photos with your surrogate.
3. Positive Pregnancy Test
Finally, you have a baby growing. This milestone often brings tears to intended parents’ eyes, alongside excitement and relief.
One way to commit this day to memory and celebrate is to make videos, keepsakes or special announcements to loved ones.
4. End of the First Trimester
Reaching the end of the first trimester is meaningful because the risk for miscarriage decreases immensely at this point. You might take this time to recognize your surrogate, or take the opportunity to finally tell friends and family that you’re expecting a baby.
Create Meaningful Traditions
Traditions can help make lasting family memories that you’ll cherish for years to come. Intended parents can involve the surrogate in the process or begin these traditions as a family unit.
The tradition does not need to be elaborate, but it can help give you something to look forward to, even when the stress or worry of surrogacy starts to creep in.
Some ideas for traditions you can start now include:
- Monthly bump photos or photos with a fruit that matches the size of your baby at that time
- Shared journals between surrogate and intended parents
- Pregnancy milestone gifts
- Gender reveal celebrations
- Baby showers, either with or without your surrogate
- Countdown calendars to delivery day
Recognize Your Surrogate
Surrogates commit themselves physically, emotionally and mentally to carrying someone else’s baby. Offering small acts of gratitude throughout the pregnancy can enhance the relationship between intended parents and surrogates while showing how much you appreciate the surrogate’s sacrifices.
Some ways intended parents can show their gratitude include:
- Sending care packages during pregnancy
- Arranging relaxing self-care experiences
- Celebrating birthdays or holidays together
- Writing heartfelt thank-you notes
- Including the surrogate in important celebrations
Include Friends and Family
Building a support network to journey with you throughout surrogacy is an important step. When planning your surrogacy journey celebrations, make sure to involve your support network where you can.
Some milestones you might want to invite loved ones to share in include:
- Family dinners
- Pregnancy announcements
- Baby showers
- Support gatherings
- Shared milestone updates
Document the Journey
In the moment, surrogacy likely feels like a long journey. But with time, you’ll look back and realize how quickly it went and how the memories faded.
Spend some time documenting the journey through:
- Professional photography
- Journaling
- Scrapbooks
- Video diaries
- Pregnancy milestone books
- Letters to the baby
Many of these activities also produce valuable keepsakes that will remind you of the love that went into growing your baby.
Build a Surrogacy Journey Worth Celebrating
How you enter into surrogacy does matter in whether you can find the joy and cause for celebration in each milestone. Knowing that the legalities and logistics are handled can make the process far more enjoyable for surrogates and intended parents.
Accel Conceptions is a trusted surrogacy agency that has helped many families grow when it seemed otherwise impossible. Located in California, our state laws are some of the friendliest there are toward surrogacy, making the legal process clear and straightforward.
Start your journey toward parenthood or as a surrogate now by getting in contact with our knowledgeable team.